prolouge to my first story.

    *: The fear built up more and more as she ran, it didn't help that she had a small bundle of weight against her breast whilst  running from her enemies and dodging foliage in every direction.  The clearing was just ahead and then she could rest and place the small squirming bundle in a safe place.  The couple  she had found were just beyond  her forest of a home.

    All of a sudden  she was out. The sand  was no longer too hot for bear feet so she stood there panting. The knowledge of her and her child's safety was the only thought letting her stand there. Looking up she realized the young couple she had chosen were there in front of her as she knew they would be, there mouths wide with shock.

    She was beginning  to catch her breath so she made the poor decision to  try  and  talk to them. "Hello, my name is Glade. I have come.....to....to..." and with that she fell to her knees  hyperventilating . The young  woman  who Glade new to be named Janice held the child  and began to rock, bounce, and shush the infant. The young gentleman whose name was Hark began to pick her up and take her in the direction  of a nice  blue minivan when she protested with a guttural  no. But they insisted   on housing her and her child until she could at least walk.

    The next few days were a blur of answering questions, eating, feeding, sleeping, and refusing a hospital over and over again. Why? Because if the doctor  determined  she was to have an MRI her tribe and her husband's tribe would both be in jeopardy.

    When three days had passed she could  stand without teetering and finally told them everything she could without making them either hysterical  or a liability. She didn't know what was worse. They asked for the child's name. And when she gave it they smiled and agreed to raise her for the agreed 13 years. Finally Margaret was safe.*

18 and college.

I am 18 going on 19 now and about to start some 9 week classes in a community college. My anticipation is far worse for me I am sure so accepting the difficult work ahead is all I can do to prepare. However, this doesn't mean I'm not happy. I am quite satisfied with my position, after all, I have so much and it could be so much worse. I hope that as life goes on through college and onwards I can keep seeing the silver lining, and I hope you can too. With love and hope, thanks for reading!

17 and going.

     I turned 17 in December and so many things are happening in my life such as getting a driving permit. I have been taking medication for my pain and am currently going to a sycologist (for multiple reasons but mostly monitoring for one of my medications) and I am trying to work very hard. I hope anyone reading this realizes that I am still having a rough time but I am here for you and so is God.

     *With more love than can be spoken*
          -Jessica

Comic book heroes?

     A thought has been swimming through my mind for a long time, "What if I could fly?" Of course  such an idea is nearly impossible but the idea remains. Take for example the Wright brothers they had this idea and gave us planes. These conic book super heroes are just another direction you can go with that idea.
     I have always thought about what it would be like if people, real people, had these abilities. Somehow these ideas can get me through the day when I'm in a rough patch, I love these ideas and it encourages me to look ahead because these stories don't just depict people with powers, they show people with struggles which we all have to undertake sometimes.
     My conclusion? Read a comic book and imagine the possibilities. With love and hope -Jessica*

Book

This blog was originally going to be about books,(hence the name) so I would like to recommend not one but TWO books to you.
1. Hush, a sweet story about a young girl and her family when they go through the witness protection program.

2. Walk two moons, about another young girl going through a rough move from a nice open ranch to a small yarded tiny house.

     These are both good reads and I enjoy them greatly. Thank you for reading. See ya!

More than sad......joy

     In life though these bumps in the road may fall in our way we must trust God. This blog is NOT going to be a complete downer all the time. So let me tell you some good things, dear reader, after all, what is life without one small shred of good?
     So, I will tell you that I am happy with my life. I look for the good things and try to stay positive despite the pain and I am succeeding. If you share this struggle and try to live a normal life without any one knowing, come out of your shell. You are not alone.




*     This weekend I am going to Arkansas so you wont hear from me for lack of WiFi. However I will have a great time and I hope this weekend YOU will too. Have a nice weekend and see you soon.

Lets talk about it.

     We all remember when we fell and scraped our knee when we were little. You know what? We cried because it hurt. After awhile of falling and scraping we learned about some of the cracks in the pavement we had to avoid.
     This can be an analogy for pain syndromes. After all their are triggers that we see before it truly begins. In this way these"cracks" are less prominent over time and we learn to avoid them. However new ones come and we are still tiptoeing around feeling like at any moment we could fall harder, and we do. It is a constant battle of were am I standing today or right now.
     What I want you to learn from this is that we all fall, but how many times can you get back up again is up to you.